Commitment Phobic

I am talking about me here. And not in the commited to Doodle kinda way. I would commit to that dude in two seconds flat. I'm talking the everyday kinda commitment. You know, the little stuff.

Like committing to clean. I actually chose to work extra instead of go home to cleaning. And I do not like work. My house isn't really that bad but I couldn't just say I am going to clean and do it.
Or going for walks. I even bought the shoes. And the walk really isn't all that difficult. I have no reason not to go besides I don't wanna. I even at one time decided I was going to Florida (even bought the tickets) but backed out. Granted, there was hurricanes coming and the nutjob was really not keen on the idea but still, absolutely no follow through on my part.

So this is my problem. I don't know why I can't go through with anything. Okay, that's not true. If I am not good at something or am slightly uncomfortable, I won't even go for it. Which boils down to the confidence that I should have, but don't. Considering where I came from in the confidence/personality sense, I have come a long way but it's just not enough to me. I want to be able to say I am doing something and have no qualms about it. So that is my plan.

I am gonna start this plan with the dress. The really fun pretty dress. I never, ever, EVER wear them. The last time I wore one was in May 2005 for my friends wedding. I was in the wedding so I had no choice. And I have committed to wearing heels (but the ones I bought hurt) so I may go with baby steps-heels for the wedding, sandals for the reception. See, no commitment.